Ever get writers’ block? It’s a pain in the buns.

Have you noticed that I haven’t written a single word in, oh, I don’t know how many days? That’s because life is SO BORING AND MONOTONOUS! Do you know, I’ve been sitting on my bum and watching TV SO much?? It’s terribly unhealthy for the tummy, actually. My poor belly may have caught a few pounds. And it’s SO hard to motivate myself to, you know, get up and go outside and actually do something with my time.

I guess I should attribute that to the fact that: a.) most of my friends had been in school doing exams whilst I, as a senior, am exempt, and b.) I don’t have that many friends to begin with, so it never really was an option.

But back to my writers’ block; it’s taken over EVERYTHING! I mean, I was insulted by a kid (a KID!), and I wasn’t able to think of one clever comeback that would send him back to his mommy’s arms so that he would learn a bit of decency and respect. Come ON. This is starting to affect my mental in/output. People are beginning to consider me as an actual BLONDE. As in, stupid, dumb, can’t-walk-in-a-straight-line-without-testing-the-gravity blonde, not merely that “Oh, check out that chap. She’s blonde” comment.

Because of this abominable writers’ block, I’ve been wasting away on my couch, watching Doctor Who, Burn Notice, and the Mentalist (On two side notes: ♫#1.) Not exactly “wasting away”. I’ve bought quite a lot of junk food from Harris Teeter using my handy-dandy discount. ♫#2.) Burn Notice teaches me about the fine arts of spying, so I can’t really count anything against that one, either.)

I need help.  I must, need, MUST, crawl out of this literary hole that I’ve dug for myself within the dark confines of my mind. Save me! I’m DYING in here!