New Beginnings, and the Beginning of the End

You know, school starts in two days. Not even that, if you count the hours. I’m so incredibly nervous and incredibly excited at the same time. Talk about mixed feelings! Worst part: I have no IDEA what to expect except what I’ve seen from movies like Mean Girls and Pretty in Pink.

That’s the worst feeling; that chasm you feel in the pit of your stomach when you’ve no idea what to expect, what you’re doing, and the thought that you’ve never experienced this before. Why, I felt this way just yesterday when I got on the high dive. I mean, this was really high. I was used to the little fun ones that give you a nice good bounce before hurling you into the air to arc gracefully into the water. No, this way a high dive. I was standing on the edge of the stupid board, my toes dangling over the edge and water dripping from my hair into the pool below, and all I could think was “I’m so gonna die, what the heck am I doing up here?” That was all I could think. And yet…in the back of my mind, there was that irresistible urge that was coaxing me forward, that urge to fall.

And I gave in to it. Not only for the urge’s sake, of course. There was the threat of the jeers and boos, and the humiliation that would reside with me forever should I chicken out and climb off of the high dive. Seriously, once you walk up those fateful steps, there’s no going back. Even this seven-year old kid made it, for crying out loud! I would never live it down.

So I jumped. And it was fantastic.

No, really. Falling, that thrill coursing up and down your back like a cold finger of ice, and the adrenaline pumping through your veins as you watched the water approaching at an alarming rate. It’s at those moments that you really feel alive. Call me an adrenaline junky, if you want. Still, tons of fun.

So that’s kind of how I feel about school. It’s like standing on that diving board again. No turning back, something completely new and foreign that you have never attempted before. I don’t know what it’s going to be like, but if it’s like that jump off of the high dive, I’ll gladly do it.

Unless, of course, there’s an unsatisfactory splat at the end.

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