There is always that awkward moment when a guy that you’ve known for a long time tells you that he’s….well, attracted to you. That moment is made even more awkward by the fact that he:
1.) Dated your cousin, two friends, and several (dozen) more girls
2.) Only started “liking” you after you got contacts
3.) Assumes automatically that I’ll say yes (to girlfriendship) just like that *snaps fingers*, no questions asks, and no ifs, ands, or buts involved.
Now, I like this guy just fine and everything, but as a friend and/or brother, which he positively HATED hearing. “How am I like a brother?” He asks. Well, let me answer that for you.
1.) You dated my cousin, two of my friends, and several (dozen) more girls
2.) I’ve known you for several years and never had nor been given any symptoms of “likeage” by either party
3.) You’re friends with my brother. That would be just awkward.
But that got me to thinking about how people are starting to date at progressively younger ages as the years pass. Kids as young as Middle School are no strangers to kisses, hugs, dating, or anything beyond “first base”.
I have never dated, and I can honestly say that I don’t plan to with the way teenage maturity is right now. Maybe during college or after, when (hopefully) teens settle into themselves and mature into their full potential. Then I can have an honest-to-goodness relationship with someone where I don’t have to worry if childish peevishness will interfere with the relationship.
Its crazy. It’s like the world as a whole wants children to grow up at younger and younger ages, but not into responsible people; the media especially emphasizes the social relationships upon which “society is built upon”. Just look at Nickolodean or the Disney Channel, and what do you see? Good Luck Charlie – the whole show is strewn with broken relationships between Teddy and her ex-boyfriends. H20 Just Add Water – Tons of stress placed upon relationships there. It really is just ridiculous. And the worst part is that children buy into this “ideal” and feel like they need to conform in order to fit into it.
The way I see it, the more relationships you are involved in, the more pieces of your heart you give away. With each girlfriend or boyfriend, you place a trust on them; trust that they will remain faithful; trust that they will honor both you and your requests; and trust that your secrets and innermost desires are secure with them. When you break up, the trust you place in those people breaks off with the relationship, and what else is a fundamental concept of love but trust?
When I walk down the aisle to finally meet my fiancee, my gown a softly swirly cloud of white the dances around me like beams of light, I don’t want to remember all the past loves that I had and think of the smaller piece of a whole that I have to give to my husband. To walk down the aisle and stand beside him, saying my vows but thinking that I have less to give. I don’t want that.
Thus, I don’t date. Simple as that. Sorry, “friend-who’s-like-a-brother”, try again in about a decade.